A few months before coronavirus changed our life and lifestyle, I was very friendly with my Jamaican co-worker. We would eat lunch together and also go walking on our breaks. He made going to work fun and our walks would be something I looked forward to. In fact, we would be by each other’s cubicle so much that some co-workers started asking if we had something going on.
In March, right before the lockdown, my parents had a party and I invited him. Right after the party we went on lockdown and started working from home but we would still talk on the phone multiple times every day. On almost every phone call my mother would come up in the conversation and he would talk about how beautiful and sexy she is. My mother is 44 but she can easily pass for early thirties.
Anyway, he convinced me to watch that Reggae Verzus and I enjoyed it. I asked him to send me some good songs from both the artists and he made me a Spotify Playlist. The list had about 25 songs which I had to struggle to understand what the artists were saying in most of the songs but he made it is duty to translate one of the songs for me, line by line. That song was “Old Dog” by Beenie Man and I must say I had a good laugh when he told me what the line “Me is a bwoy wi’ slam all mi mother-in-law” meant. I thought the line was just catchy, disgusting when you think about it but very catchy in a song. After all, DMX said in a song, “I got blood on my hands and there is no remorse… I got blood on my dick because I f$%ked a corpse”. So I am well aware that artists sometime put things in their songs just for the shock value and to get the listeners attention.
However, my friend made it slip out of his mouth that he would slam my mother and I had to put him in his place. Of course, she is not his mother-in law but I still found it disgusting since I felt like had it not been for the pandemic we could have been intimate and based on our conversations during the pandemic, it would happen after we went back to somewhat normal life.
Needless to say we did not talk as much after he made his comment. I answered his calls but I never initiated a call to him. He did turn me into a Reggae fan though and when I heard “Welcome to Jamrock” by Damian Marley I had to text him and tell him how I love the song. He gave me a history of the song about how it was originally recorded by Ini Kamoze. So I checked out the Ini Kamoze’s version and became a fan of Ini Kamoze’s music.
The summer passed and I am now a huge Ini Kamoze fan and my friend and I are back to where we were before he made his silly comment about slamming my mother. Because I have Ini Kamoze as one of my favorite artists, Spotify plays a lot of his songs throughout the day when I am listening. So yesterday, I am working, going about my days as usual when Spotify started playing a song “Betty Brown’s Mother” by Ini Kamoze.
The song spoiled my day. The words of my friend came crashing back and all I could hear in my head the rest of the day was, “honestly though, I would love to slam your mother.”